Every time I’m asked to predict how my team will get on in their next game I always say that we will win 6-0. I’ve been saying it for years, and according to the club statisticians it has been years (1999 in a Ryman League game v Hendon to be exact) since we last won a game 6-0, but I still persist. I’ve been told by some of the players that my predictions are ‘legendary’ (makes a change from me being called daft!). The reason that I do this is because I want my team to win 6-0. If I had to go to every game thinking that we’d scrape a win, a draw or even worse, lose, how would I ever get any sleep at night? However, dreaming of 6-0 victories, with Tony Roberts (our goalie) sitting on a deckchair in the sand in the goal mouth reading the paper, occasionally looking up to kick the ball back up the field, one of our players scoring a hatrick, and others joining the party (or even better, a loathesome player from the opposition scoring an own goal!), helps me sleep.
There is something special too about a 6-0 victory; 5-0 means you played very well, 5-1 means you slipped up somewhere, 7 goals and above means the other team were appalling and probably laid down and died, but 6-0 means you were outstanding.
I know my football team are struggling in League 2 but I still want them to be outstanding, and I still believe that we will win 6-0.
I wrote this at the end of last season, and then at the first game of the new season we finally won 6-0 at home to Chester. The feeling of winning 6-0 was far better than I could ever have predicted, and I was lucky enough to be awarded the match ball, by one of the match ball sponsors Brian East. I have been repeatedly asked if I am going to change my predictions and the answer is no. Winning 6-0 is so good, I want to see my team do it again, and again, and again!